The Power of a Mother's Love

Grief, denial, coping and acceptance— these are the emotional stages that parents of children with special needs go through, and she went through this painful process herself.

Anne Ramos-Rafanan gave birth to Josh, a perfectly healthy baby boy who met all the developmental milestones— until he was two years old.  So when Josh was diagnosed with autism after suffering from seizures, and changed behaviors, Anne was devastated.

She went through the whole painful process together with her husband.  It was unbearable but they decided to be proactive about it and do everything they can for Josh. 

It was from this pain that her passion for helping other children with special needs was born.

Jumpstart Intervention Center was established in 2009 to cater to the rising cases of autism and other special needs among children in Bacolod.  Since then, it has helped ease and enrich the lives of countless children and their families.

Today, Anne continues to passionately share what she knows about autism through her school and in every opportunity that she has.  She feels strongly about spreading awareness about autism, which is why last year, she organized the First Autism Awareness Fun Run. 

Anne with Zoot Mktg. Mgr. Marge Camacho, Race Organizer
Tricia Rodriguez and Event Organizer ZsaZsa Veloso

It was such a success that just last Sunday, we celebrated the Second Autism Awareness Fun Run at The District North Point mall in Talisay. The thrust of these events is to inform the public about how important early detection is in the successful management of autism. 

As Anne learned and is now sharing, autism in itself is not a tragedy.  What is tragic is the ignorance about this affliction and not giving these children the necessary treatment and care.  That is why she feels it is important for people to know how to detect autism as early as possible by watching out for these unusual behaviors among children: difficulty in communicating, no eye contact, lining up objects, difficulty in paying attention, repeating phrases or sentences again and again to calm themselves down, flapping their arms when they are happy, or hurting themselves when they’re frustrated.

Autism lasts throughout a person’s lifetime.  There is no cure, but treatment can help.  These include behavior and communication therapies and medicines to control the symptoms.

The fun run was well attended by groups of families, friends, co-workers and athletes who came to support the event.  There was a special category for the children with special needs who joined the 1K category.  I took my own children with me and we ran together with their cousins and friends.  It was a wonderful way for the community to get together to support the cause and the vision of Anne in spreading awareness about autism.

Papa Janno and I hosting the event, with Gabe
who won 5th place in the 10-13 years old, 1K Category

In spite of all the difficulties of running the school, what keeps Anne going are the smiles and the hugs that she gets from other special children, the light in the eyes of the parents after their special child says “I love you” for the first time and the tears in the parents’ eyes when the children say “Thank you.” 

But in the midst of Anne’s big contribution to our society—for all her hard work and sacrifices as well as her successes— is still her earnest desire and prayer to see Josh fully recovered.  As she places her hopes on this, she continues to be a tremendous blessing to many children and their families, and she continues to be an inspiration to many, including myself.

(Published for Breathing Gratitude, Sun Star Lifestyle Section on June 26, 2014)

Children are God's Best Presents

I WAS a fulfilled yet quite a frustrated mother when I had my first child, Gabe.  Yes, I experienced an increased capacity to love and care for the new life that God had entrusted upon me.  A kind of fulfilment that cannot compare with anything else in the world, but I was also overwhelmed by the uncertainties that came with being a new mother. 

For one thing, he was born prematurely at seven and a half months.  During his first months, I had to measure and keep record of his milk intake as well as his output.  Being a tiny 3.9-pound newborn baby, I had to make sure that he finished one-ounce of milk every three hours. 

I was anxious because I wanted everything to be perfect for Gabe.  I took care of him during the first five months because I couldn’t trust anyone to give him the kind of care that I wanted him to have.

Fast forward to three years later. Ella came out at 35 weeks, just a week before being considered full term. She was technically premature but healthy enough to be born without any complications.  At 5.4 pounds, she was a healthy baby girl who was generally predisposed to being a happy and contented baby, just like her big brother.

Ella loved falling asleep on this sling

Ella's first halloween costume! 

It was fun buying pink dresses, and all the pink stuff for her.  I enjoyed wearing her on a sling and bringing her everywhere I went just as I did with Gabe.  My family laughs whenever I breastfed her in the most unusual places. The one that tops the list was while riding a tuktuk in Phuket.

I taught her baby sign language at 6 months and at around 8 to 9 months old, she started doing them.  I was so amazed that babies could actually be trained at such a young age! It was also so adorable to see her communicate with us in this way.  She would say “milk,” “more,” “please,” “thank you,” and “I love you” in sign language and it amused us every time.

Gabe and Ella at Las Vegas for Nana Ives' Wedding

Although at first Gabe had difficulty adjusting to the changes when Ella came, he later on started to enjoy having a sister when she began to respond to him.

Gabe and Ella on the plane going to Cebu

Ella has been such a blessing to us over the years.  Her thoughtfulness has touched and blessed us as she loves to write notes and cards and buy or make little gifts to surprise us with. 

Ella can fall asleep anywhere, especially when she is being carried

When anyone in the house gets sick, she automatically appoints herself as head nurse.  One time when I had fever, she sat by my bed the whole day.   Every time I woke up from my sleep, she would still be right beside me, ready to give me whatever I needed.

Ella bringing joy to Lolo Ed

She asks to tag along with me wherever I go.  Many times I discourage her from coming along because I think she would get bored and I could get things done faster without her.  But whenever I allow her to, she really doesn’t mind waiting for hours just to be with me, and she never complains. 

Both Gabe and Ella have turned out to be such great blessings to me. Many times I feel I don’t deserve such love and devotion. That is when I thank God profusely for the precious gift of my children. 

The joy and loves of my life

I contemplate on these things because we recently celebrated Ella’s 9^thbirthday.  It was a day of simple celebrations but a grand day of gratitude for me.  I thank God for choosing me to be the steward of these two amazing people and for His daily protection.

I believe that when God wants to bless us in a grand way, He gives us children.  Of course, given that the circumstances are right.  And He does this by nothing less than creating an image of and giving us a piece of Himself.

Many times, we parents get so caught up with our daily tasks that we lose focus on the things that matter most.  Having our children healthy, by our side and fully alive is something that I remind myself to be thankful for every day.

Silly Ella and Gabe ready to swim at Plantation Bay

Ella now all grown up on her 9th birthday

(Published for Breathing Gratitude, Sun Star Lifestyle Section on June 12, 2014)

The Full Gymnastics Experience

THIRTY-NINE point four degrees Celsius was the reading on the thermometer when I took my daughter's temperature the night before her first gymnastics competition. It was weird for someone who hardly gets sick (which I attribute to her being a fully breast-fed baby). There was neither cough nor colds, just high fever that came from nowhere.

In spite of her high temperature and her feeling weak she was decided get well and join the competition. Her Lolo and Lola were already conditioning her in case she didn’t get well the next day, that it’s okay to forego this one as there will be many more competitions that she can join in the future.  But she was dead set on recovering.

She religiously followed every remedy that would make her get well.  And sure enough, the next day, the fever was gone and she got the go signal from our doctor to join the competition.  It was as if she knew that was to happen.

After only one month of training, she has grown passionate and dedicated to the sport.  And to culminate the summer program, the new gymnasts were to be given the opportunity to experience a real competition.  It was a friendship meet, but still, it was a competition with rules and distinguished judges who would score their performances.

So to prepare for their 4:30pm competition, she got her hair and make up done at Victor Ortega Salon at 12:00 noon.  Even that was all part of the whole experience.  She felt special, and just like a real gymnast.

Ella getting her hair and makeup done at Victor Ortega

At one thirty p.m. they all gathered at the activity center of The District, Ayala North, where the competition was to take place.  Little gymnasts warmed up and did cartwheels, bridges, splits and all sorts of stunts. It was a beautiful sight!

The District Ayalan North Point was the perfect venue for the event

They each were given a chance to practice their routine before the actual competition.  The nervousness and excitement was evident among the gymnasts as family and relatives started filling the audience area. Some gymnasts together with their coaches were even able to experience being interviewed on TV as the GMA news team came to feature the event. 

The GMA News team doing interviews on the young gymnasts

Then it was time to begin. The host for the afternoon, Mr. Adrian Bobe, led the crowd in opening the event, with the Pambansang Awit sung by Ms. Abigaile Capay, Owner of JumpStart, and the opening prayer led by Megan Reyes.  The opening number was an impressive production by all the students from the youngest 3-year-old gymnasts to the most senior 12-year-old gymnasts.  

The gymnasts doing their group production number

As soon as the judges were in place, my daughter Ella was called, being the first to do the solo performance.  As she did her cartwheels and rolls, there was no trace of fever that was there the night before.  She was nervous yet passionate about what she was doing.  I was a proud mom.

The ten other gymnasts who performed were fantastic!  You wouldn’t think that they are new to the sport.  In between solo performances, the artistic group and the rhythmic group performed their group numbers.  After all the performances, 3 gymnasts from Pulupandan performed an exhibition routine.

The full experience happened when Coach Benjamin Capay conducted the awarding.  Although all 11 gymnasts received medals and certificates, they each were scored based on the level of difficulty, execution and choreography. The following were the Gold medalists:  Megan Reyes – 15.5, Jenny Eusebio – 14.4, Malexi Puentevella – 13.9.  The Silver medalists were: Nicole Pura – 12.0, Dominique Infante – 11.5, Angel dela Pena – 10.9.  The Bronze medalists were: Ella Ochoa – 10.3, Rita Cuadra – 10.2, Pauline Velez – 10.1, Keona Sayo – 9.0, Sayana Tabuga – 8.9.

The gymnasts anxiously awaiting the results of the competition

The gymnasts with their medals and certificates with Coach Abi & Coach Benjamin

This was a memorable experience especially for these eleven gymnasts, which fired up their passion for this new sport that they have grown to love over the summer.

Ella with Coach Lady, Coach Jenny and Coach Anna

The happy gymnast

(Published for Breathing Gratitude, Sun Star Lifestyle Section on June 5, 2014)