The Beautiful Gift of Breastfeeding

WHEN my children were much younger, one of the things that I really enjoyed about motherhood was breastfeeding.  It is a special kind of emotional activity that cements a mother and child relationship right from the very start.  It creates a special kind of attachment that makes the two inseparable. 

My Happy, Healthy, Breastfed Babies

During that time, I made it my main preoccupation.  I was at their disposal 24/7.  I breastfed every three hours and I stored excess milk for times when I needed to be away.  I was obsessive compulsive about my milk storage.  I placed them on little plastic containers that had dates on them.  First In First Out was the rule. 

There was even a time when my stored milk supply was filling up our freezer that I was able to donate breast milk through a breastfeeding advocate who hooked up mommies who had excess milk supply with mommies of babies who were sick and could not breastfeed for some reason.  My milk went to a baby boy with congenital heart disease.  Sadly, he didn’t make it and eventually went to heaven, God bless him.

Breastfeeding meant bringing my children wherever I went.  For me, this was the fun part!  They got to travel, run errands and do grocery with me.  This may be a hassle for some, but since I’m the kind of person who likes having loved ones nearby, I enjoyed it!  I had my trusty baby sling and it was strike anywhere for us. 

At first it was awkward having people stare at you but eventually I didn’t care. My baby was hungry and we had to do what was necessary at that moment.  It also helps a lot that many of the malls now have breastfeeding rooms where moms could breastfeed comfortably.

These are all just MY emotional benefits of breastfeeding as a mother.  For the child, I feel that they become a more secure and confident individual. 

There’s also the invaluable health benefit of building in them a strong immune system.  I notice that my second child who breastfed much longer, is less likely to catch a virus as compared to all of us in the household.

To celebrate the beautiful gift of breastfeeding during this National Breastfeeding Awareness Month of August, the Bacolod Mom & Baby Club (BMBC) and the Institute for Negros Development (IND) has organized a half-day breastfeeding activity called Hakab Na Bacolod 2014.  This will be on Saturday, August 2, 2014 from 9:00 AM to 11:00 AM at the Santuario de la Salle.  The event seeks to promote the importance of providing proper support to all breastfeeding Filipino mothers and families.

This will be held in coordination with the Big Latch On – an annual breastfeeding event where moms gather at registered locations around the world and latch on simultaneously at 10:30 AM.  Last year, there were 14,536 mothers at 845 different locations in 28 countries all over the world.

BMBC Founding Members (Photo Credits: Jireh Poquita)

Breastfeeding moms gathered at Aristocrat, Manila in 2013
(Photo Credits: Keysi Nunez)

Moms and Babies of Cagayan de Oro,
organized by Mommy Bright Side (Photo Credits: Meg Gabe) 

This year, they plan to beat the numbers as the event will be participated in and represented by Bacolod, Manila, Cebu, Davao, Cagayan de Oro and Iloilo. 

Here, moms will get to meet and interact with other breastfeeding moms.  There will be various activities and it will be a fun event for the whole family! 

The good news is, registration for this event is free!  All they have to do is text the following information to 0922-4846708: Mothers name, Child’s name and age, mobile number and email address.  Participants may also check updates posted on BMBC’s Facebook page:http://www.facebook.com/bacolodmomandbabyclub.

(Published for Breathing Gratitude, Sun Star Lifestyle Section on July 31, 2014)

The Power of Gratitude

I DON’T KNOW how I began to gravitate towards gratitude these recent years.  Maybe I picked it up from the seminars and books that I have read, and in all of that I somehow came to believe that having a grateful disposition is the key to happiness in life.

My favorite video that I used to watch with my kids a lot when they were much younger was a VeggieTales episode entitled “Madame Blueberry” and the lesson was on thankfulness.  She was a sad blueberry who acquired an excess of material things yet had emptiness within.  She later on learned from Junior the Asparagus how one could find true happiness just by being thankful and content with what he has.  The theme song of that episode “because a thankful heart is a happy heart…” was forever ingrained in me.

VeggieTales Madame Blueberry Video

Gratitude resonated with me so much that it became my guide, so much so that I coined the phrase “Breathing Gratitude” and made it the name for my blog and my column in Sun Star.

Breathing gratitude is still a work in progress for me.  It is a deliberate practice for me as I still catch myself complaining, worrying and grumbling sometimes.  But when I do, I try to immediately snap out of it, take a deep breath and utter a “thank you” even in difficult situations.  That simple practice instantly makes my mood much lighter.

Another practice that I have always attempted to do was to keep a “blessings notebook”.  This is the practice of writing down blessings or things that I am thankful for everyday.  I’ve started doing this a few times but doing this consistently is always a challenge especially when my days get busy.  This is such a powerful practice in increasing gratitude.

Recently I learned another strategy that could further deepen gratitude.  As I write the things that I am thankful for I also write my reasons behind it.  This makes me even more grateful for each blessing as I realize how my life would be so different without it.

I'm an introvert and I love getting lost in the beauty of Nature

Things that we normally take for granted such as our eyes, will totally change our lives if we didn’t have them.   Can you imagine how difficult life would be without legs?  Think of how unhealthy we will be without exercise, or how inconvenient it would be just to go to the bathroom or take a bath.

Good Health is a wonderful gift that is most often taken for granted

Think of how one family would give anything for a healthy heart to save one member of their family.  Many times we take our fully functioning organs for granted, not remembering that without any of these, life would be oh so difficult. 

Many times we take the people around us for granted until we lose them.  Sadly, that is when we realize how much we should have expressed our love for them.

The list goes on and on from health, to relationships, to blessings of provision, to nature, to spirituality, among many others.  The list is endless as there are just too many things that we could and should be thankful for.

Looking back now I realize that my level of contentment and happiness has dramatically increased since I began practicing breathing gratitude.  This happened even if the circumstances of my life hasn’t changed. 

Teaching is a blessing that is close to my heart

Life still throws challenges and stumbling blocks at me but having a positive outlook and a grateful disposition makes things a lot lighter.  It is my desire to share the power of gratitude, which I know will bring much joy and meaning in your life as well.

RELATIONSHIPS is what I am most grateful for,
especially the gift of my children.

(Published for Breathing Gratitude, Sun Star Lifestyle Section on July 24, 2014)

Celebrating Friendship in Style

EVEN the humblest, simplest and most modest woman will agree with me when I say that looking good is important in being confident as a woman.  It’s not the only thing that will make one shine in her giftedness, but it does play a role in empowering women.  Looking good doesn’t mean one needs to wear the most expensive and well-known brands.  All it takes is wearing good quality pieces that are suitable to one’s body type and personal style.

There are many brands out there for us to choose from but it is rare to find a local brand that is up to par with international brands.  So I was delighted when Olivia opened in Bacolod because this is exactly what it is.  A local brand that has set international-quality standards in clothing! It is a brand that believes a woman must look good and be comfortable in whatever occasion – whether at the beach, at the mall or at a wedding.

Last Saturday, Olivia launched its new campaign “Olivia Celebrate Friendship” at the District, Ayala North Point.  The campaign is all about highlighting the gift of friendship and how it is timeless, fun and free, just like Olivia. 

OLIVIA Managing Director, Antoinette Lacson

Friendship plays a great role in a woman’s life.  When she is down, she needs her friends to confide in and cheer her up.  When she is happy, she needs them to share her joy with.  So in every phase of a woman’s life, from her childhood, in her teens, or even in motherhood, her friends are faithfully allies.

Duo Category 1st Place Winner Michelle Benedicto

Group Category 2nd Place Winner Anna Escalante

This is evident in the 300 plus entries that were sent in Olivia’s Celebrate Friendship Photo Contest, where women uploaded photos of their favorite bonding moments with their friends on Facebook and Instagram.  There were funny photos of friends that go way back from childhood, moving photos of mother and daughter who consider each other as best friends, and friends who have nothing but crazy fun at the beach. 

Duo Category 2nd Place Winner Toni Diente

Duo Category 3rd Place Winner Arianna Marie Condo

Together with the launch of the new campaign was the launch of its new collection.  One thing that I really love about Olivia is the choice of fabrics.  They use soft and comfortable fabric, yet the prints and colors are visually pleasing to the eye.  For this collection, there are a lot of shades of lilacs, blues and greens.

OLIVIA Brand Ambassadors Antoinette Lacson, Anya Gamboa,
Martina Quirino, Jennie Garcia and Pam Jalandoni

The 2^nd to 6^th place winners of the Duo and Group Category of the photo contest won fabulous gift bags from Olivia.  While the 1^st place winners of the Duo and Group Categories won P25,000 and P40,000 respectively, worth of shopping spree at Olivia.  These prizes are such a treat to these women who joined in celebrating their friendships with Olivia.

Group Category 1st Place Winners
claiming their prize

Group Category 1st Place Winner Jumpee Tipon

Finding beautiful, good quality clothes that make us look great is one of women’s simple joys, and one can find these at Olivia.  Other brands that the stores carry are Havaianas, Bensimon, Thread 365, Seychelles, Dupe and Praiaz.  Olivia branches are at the District, Ayala North Point, 2^nd Floor Robinson’s Place Bacolod and Ground Floor, Balay Quince.

(Published for Breathing Gratitude, Sun Star Lifestyle Section on July 10, 2014)

The Importance of Time In

The sound of children wailing, crying, and whining is a common thing you will hear in preschools in the beginning of the school year. From the security of their own homes, they are challenged to step out of their comfort zones and be under the authority and care of people who are strangers to them. School stress is said to be very common among children.

Similarly, older children experience school stress as they enter a new school year and anxiously discover their new environment. Having a new classroom, new teachers, new classmates, and sometimes, a new school, is quite a lot to handle for many. 

But after some time, children learn to adjust and adapt, just like adults do. As they begin to trust their teachers and get accustomed to the routine, they begin to realize that school isn’t so bad after all and it can actually be really fun.  This process may be simple and easy for some. But for others, it may take a lot more time, effort and emotional stress, not only on the child, but even more so on the parents.

First day of school stress (photo from www.nymetroparents.com)

You see, it’s not only the child who has to adjust, it’s also the parents who need to let go and to learn to entrust their precious children fully to the care of the teachers.  I’ve seen how difficult this could be for both children and parents, and it is my job as the teacher to help make this process a little bit easier.

I recently attended a talk titled “Sad, Mad, Glad: How Emotions Affect Children’s Behavior,” organized by the Philippine Mental Health Association as part of their 38^thanniversary celebration.  The talk was given by PMHA national president Dr. Cornelio Banaag Jr.

PMHA talk at the L' Fisher Hotel ballroom

It was a very informative and inspiring talk given to an audience of doctors, teachers, school administrators, parents and members of PMHA. Personally, I learned more about child development and how to help them with the difficulties they encounter.  But there was one statement that really struck me, which I really took to heart.

Dr. Cornelio Banaag Jr.

Dr. Banaag talked about how discipline is very important in helping children regulate their emotions. Self-regulation, or attaining EQ (emotional quotient or emotional intelligence), as we know in recent studies, is one of the most important life-skills that makes an individual successful and happy in life.  But the foundation of self-regulation is discipline, and to this, one of the things he said was…

“For TIME OUT to work, there must be a lot of TIME IN.” 

Most of us practice letting our children have “time out” whenever they misbehave.  Letting them sit on the “thinking chair” is the same principle, which allows them to calm down, take a breather and think about the misbehavior that just happened and how they can behave better next time.

But for these “time outs” to work and for discipline to be effective, Dr. Banaag emphasizes the importance of establishing a good relationship with the child first, or what he refers to as “time in.”

This also means that for a child to respect authority, he must first and foremost feel genuinely loved and cared for by the person in authority. Persons in authority need to give a lot of “time in,” so that when correction is necessary, he or she can be firm and yet be respected by the child.

As I was reminded about this, I immediately put it into practice in school the next day. And true enough, I was able to win a child over just by deciding to spend the morning with him. The child who was wailing for weeks, showing his protest in being separated from his parents, became securely independent in class that same morning… all because I gave some “time in.” 

My Co-Teacher Ria Corral and our
self-regulated students Maria and Gabby

So dear parents, remember to ask yourselves this question whenever you feel that your discipline strategies are not working: Have you invested a lot of time in?

On the other hand, some parents may have given a lot of time in, but are very loose in discipline.  Remember that our children also need firm but loving discipline. 

For our children to be happy, self-regulated and disciplined individuals, we need to give them the right balance of firm discipline with a lot of love.  And as they say, love is spelled T-I-M-E.*

Disciplined and Self-Regulated Children are happy children!
(photo from baronessco.tumblr.com)

(Published for Breathing Gratitude, Sun Star Bacolod Lifestyle Section on July 3, 2014)